5 Days…Whensday….

Its been a wonderful and interesting 5 days with my Master … He and i have been able to really connect and grow during this ThanksTaking holiday weekend … With all the hustle and bustle of our schedules and events.. it brought lots of opportunity for discovery , reflection and growth … i am so Thankful for every day .. and these last few were really meaningful.

Day One ~ Day job and Spanksgiving Eve party …

my day job is very stressful  to me ,, and i have been working on facing the issues that i have in relation to my career … so the day at work was stressful but i didn’t let it get to me .. i was able to see the situation as transitory and not feel attached to the stress… i practiced patience and understanding but not without effort .. so a potentially “bummer” day turned out to be an opportunity to put my theories into practice… and it was a success !!! When i was in a meeting with the owner of the company .. i didn’t take her negativity as a personal attack and was able to view it impartially …i left the office feeling good !!!

The Spanksgiving Eve party was pretty ok.. i helped Master be the dungeon monitor, but there wasn’t much to monitor.. a not too many people were playing .. but i had the chance to look at my “uptightness” and see that alot of my issues come from my feelings of jealousy and resentment … i actually feel jealous of other peoples freedoms and ability to be comfortable in public sexual scenes … i find myself longing to feel free.. free of my judgments of myself.. free of  my fear ,,, but honestly,,, i would have NO PROBLEM if Master ever wanted to play with me like that .. the couple times He DID play with me like that.. i really really enjOyed it … but i respect His choice to NOT play with me like that .. i understand His motivations and reserve. i , once again , was able to observe that 99% of my issues are steamed from my feelings of desire , self judgement , and self centerdness.. and that i wear a mask of “prudence” to cover up my longing … the adage “thou doth protest too much ” is fairly poignant to sum up this obscure school marm attitude. Master always says i’m the most perverted prude He knows … and its true .. i am. o the Spanksgiving night   showed me a glance behind my mask … i think i see a bit of REAL skin coming out … maybe a few eyelashes !! Master has NO IDEA i’m writting about this.. so i look forward to his comments about this one …

This realization is is marvelous … i am happy to look at myself in REAL life .. look at what i have become .. and where i am going …

Master and i had a nice time though.. it was nice chatting with friends and hanging out …

Heres a pic from that night … CUTE !!!